First Steps

Matthew coaxed Abigail into taking her first steps last week. We both screamed and clapped and encouraged her. You could tell she was proud of herself. And then I cried.

Somehow every time I blog it ends up becoming my time-is-going-to-fast whine...

She's taken a few more steps over the past five days, although no more than two or three at a time. She walks pretty well if you're holding one hand, but she's still a little timid on her own. Standing is no big deal, she'll stand and play with her toys or eat a cookie or something. But if we try to get her step she usually lowers to her knees, sits down, and then smiles up at us. We know she can do it, she's just not quite ready to go all in yet.

And I'm still fine with it. I'm a mom, desperately trying to slow time down, to catch up with her rapid growth, to cherish every stage she's in. It seems like just when I'm getting used to something, a new accomplishment washes over us, and then I have to readjust all over again. From being an infant, to rolling, to scooting, to crawling, to cruising. And now walking. I know that this stage opens a whole new can of worms; it'll be a whole new world raising a toddler.

I keep thinking "I'm not ready yet". But I know I am. I'm excited for it, as much as I want her to slow down. Watching her master a big thing is so amazing as a mom. I'm proud. It sounds stupid because most children learn to walk at this age, its not really anything spectacular. But I can still remember her as an infant, sleeping on daddy's chest. I can't believe we got here so fast, I can't believe it's been 13 months now...

And I just have to swallow that twinge of pain that says "I missed so much!" and look forward to the future. To my daughter learning to walk and run and color... Learning to talk and match colors and tell me shapes. So much more to come! And so we hitch up, hold on, and move with this speeding train that's called parenthood. It's all I can do, and its all I would want anyway.