I need to build my faith sometimes, But i am so comfortable in line, I'm up there's no more time, To try to mess with this design. I'll be your hand take me as I am, I just wanna be with you, Take me as I am, cause I'm going, I was too scared to start now I'm too scared to let go, Take me as I am, Cause I'm growing, but its so hard to tell when I'm not used to this

That's exactly how I feel, only this time I'm relying on someone stronger than me. This time I won't try to do it by myself, or just with Matt. This time its the three of us, together, getting through this pregnancy, and a lifetime commitment of parenthood. All of this is still so new to me, and I feel this pressing urgency on my heart to get things right with my Savior before I begin to raise a child. I refuse to be a bad parent, and I refuse to raise my baby in a bad home. If I have to fight every day to ensure that they are safe and in a healthy relationship with God, then I'll do it. For myself, for them, and for their generation. At this point, I'm responsible for this baby. Right now most of it is health wise, their development and growth. But soon, very soon, it will be a daily spiritual battle for both me and my husband. I won't be on the losing side, on the wrong side, or be easily persuaded. I don't see this as being easy, I just see a Father who loves me too much to let me walk away, and a husband who is too dedicated to ever change my mind.

With everything in me I'm starting over, clearing this path before me, and moving with firm steps in my Lord.